Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Feel it coming

I know that there's something not right with me.
Yesterday, I fell asleep with my head on the desk for a couple of minutes and when i am awake, I feel constantly drained, complete with the CBF attitude.
I feel teary when I read books that I have read 50 times before. I'm just happy that I'm not watching soap operas at the moment. When you cry during a scene on Neighbours, you know that there is something seriously not right.
My thoughts, when i have them are darkly tinted and heading deeper down into the black.

I know that a breakdown is on the horizon. I can feel it. I can read the signs.
For me, a breakdown is a release of all repressed emotions and feelings, knowing that once it's over, it's done with for a couple more months.
Until then I'll do the weird thing with my hair, the bold coloured clothes and assure myself that there isn't really anything that wrong with me.
Also, I'll stock up on tissues so I'm prepared when that critical moment hits me.
Yeah, solving my issues with tissues again. Lots of sodden, snotty pieces of nothing filling a bin that no one else will see.
This somehow proves that I'm human.

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